Instructions for How to Walk Upwind
1/ instructions for walking up-wind: take one step forward. then three big steps sideways.
2/ waste time online stalk-envying all the talented people who ever did stuff better than you.
3/ moment: catch a handful of butterflies for yourself. clutch it to your heart, run home with it.
4/ sit down to pay the bills and smooth your frets; crumpled butterflies; beautiful regrets.
5/ find solace in rituals: the 7:19 morning train. lattés & lacy bras. hot yoga. do the downward dog until you drop.
6/ miss a phone call from a friend. walk into a room after everybody left.
7/ heave your heart up in buckets from the well of your aching belly. falter, slip & spill more than half of it.
8/ crawl inside out & up the walls until you puke; stop. carry on as if normal. duck out of sight of sm spotted at the library.
9/ why is this city all inverted? that bench looks like my living room. my room feels more gusty than the street.
10/ focus. use your muscles, use your strength. draw your art up & out of you with all the powers of your grace. (you do have power.)
11/ be kind to yourself. accept compliments when you get them. be patient. you’re going to spend all your life at this.
12/ settle for nothing short of what you’re worth. /end rant.
— yours truly, live from the A train